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We told you lard was sugar-free, sold you syrup as all fat-free. Thermonuclear war? A thousand suns? Why, the best source of vitamin D there can be!

Earlier this year, Elephant in the Lab argued that science is too insular, measuring success in terms of funding and publishing, rather than real world impacts. No wonder false facts and marketing have filled the void in popular opinion-making, perhaps best evidenced in the world of nutrition and dodgy food science. So, what could the reductio ad absurdam of all this be? How about selling thermonuclear Armageddon on the grounds of all the vitamin D the fireballs will create? // Statement by the Author

//Devonian, but not geologically speaking, Robert Bagnall’s first novel 2084 was published in 2017. He can be found at meschera.blogspot.co.uk.//